


It's Not Love, Not Yet

by kj_feybarn



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: Life on Tatooine, Multi, Obi-Wan is a little too charming for his own good, Post Order 66
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-05
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:40:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27900904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kj_feybarn/pseuds/kj_feybarn
Summary: Obi-Wan came to Tatooine to disappear; the last thing he needs is attention.Owen snorted, though it was less rude and more amused. “If you say so, Kenobi. But a word of advice, if you’re trying to avoid catching attention, you might want to stop being quite so charming.”Obi-Wan had no idea what Owen was talking about, he was quite sure he was never more than polite, he certainly wasn't charming.
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi/Owen Lars/Beru Whitesun
Comments: 35
Kudos: 534
Collections: Star Wars Rare Pairs 2020





	It's Not Love, Not Yet

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SassySnowperson](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SassySnowperson/gifts).



It was the suddenness of the change that got to him. The sheer shock of going from 100 parsecs a second to standing still.

Obi-Wan had spent practically his entire life running from one moment to the next, duties and responsibilities piling higher and higher, forcing Obi-Wan to always move faster, to perform at increasingly higher levels of skill, to bear ever heavier loads of responsibility.

To suddenly have _none_ of that had Obi-Wan feeling off-kilter. Obi-Wan didn’t know if he’d have been able to handle the situation well if that was _all_ that had happened.

But that didn’t even account for the grief.

The grief crashed over him like a constant, unending wave, keeping him in a state of endless drowning, gasping and struggling desperately for air.

Those first few weeks he tried to keep himself busy making himself a home on Tatooine, preparing for the next two decades worth of solitude where he’d stand a silent guard over Luke.

But it was too much. Too much silence, too much _nothing_ , where there was nothing to distract him from his grief.

He tried to meditate, spent hours, even days, within the Force; all he could sense was the utter _emptiness_ where the Jedi used to be, a heavy wave of darkness filling the space where the light had once shone brightly.

At some point it was just too much.

Obi-Wan Kenobi was a wanted fugitive. But Tatooine was deep enough in the outer rim that there were few who would care, and even fewer who would recognize him.

Still, he wasn’t allowed to be reckless. He shaved his beard, a difficult endeavor when even looking into the mirror was an unwanted reminder; carefully took his Jedi robes and set them away, exchanging them for an outfit that was a mix between smuggler and moisture farmer; his lightsaber he hid, not yet ready to completely set it away, but he added a blaster to his hip; life had taught him that no matter how much he might wish to avoid violence, violence had no intention of avoiding him.

He had to keep a low cover, he knew that. But that couldn’t be too hard, Tatooine was full of all sorts of colorful, interesting characters. He doubted there was anything he could do that would make him stand out much more than any of these other individuals.

He was just one man, and a completely unremarkable one at that.

And if he didn’t do _something_ , then there was a high chance that he would lose himself to the unending stillness of the ever-changing, shifting sands that surrounded him.

He tended to his vaporators, organized his home, meditated with the suns… and when that wasn’t enough, he went out in search of distraction.

-_-

“You’re good with him.” Owen watched as the man that Beru had insisted stay out the sandstorm with them looked up from where he was rocking Luke, blinking a few times as though he’d quite forgotten where he was.

“Thank you,” he murmured. Ben looked back at Luke, and Owen could see pain and grief almost radiation from his eyes. Ben shook his head, and the grief was gone, his face a picture of neutrality. “And thank you, for letting me take shelter for a few hours.”

Owen snorted at that, listening to the way the wind howled outside. “Oh, I wouldn’t be expecting this to be a quick storm, much more likely to last a few days.” He shrugged. “And you can thank Beru, she’s the one who insisted.” Not that Owen would have made anyone try to make their way through this sort of storm on their own, but he might not have been so quick to just drop Luke into Ben’s arms either.

“I will make sure to thank her as well,” Ben assured him. “As it is, if there’s anything you need from me, I’d be more than willing to help.”

Owen nodded at that, glad that whatever else there was to say about Ben, that the man knew how to be a gracious houseguest.

They fell into silence; Owen wasn’t much of a talker to start with, and he had nothing to say to this strange man who’d shown up in their lives with a baby only a few months ago. Despite that, the silence wasn’t awkward, Ben seemed content enough to focus on Luke and seemed largely unbothered by Owen watching him consideringly.

“You can come see him more often, if you like.” Owen wasn’t quite sure what made him give the offer, perhaps it was the way that Luke seemed content in Ben’s arm in a way that was rare for the sweet-tempered, but very active, child. Or perhaps it was the fact that while Ben had given Luke to him and Beru, it was still wildly clear that Ben _loved_ Luke.

Spend long enough in the desert and there were things a man could learn; love was as endless as the seas of sand and as valuable as the water they trapped from the air, and letting Luke have a little more love in his life was no threat to the love that he and Beru had for the boy.

Ben looked up at him, surprise clear on his face. “I know you’re not fond of me.”

Owen shrugged. “I don’t despise you either; it never hurts to have an able-bodied man around to help with the farm or the child-raising.”

Ben nodded at that, accepting the practicality of the offer. “Thank you, then.”

It was not an answer, either way, as to whether he’d accept the offer. But Owen figured that was just how Ben was.

-_-

“Did you hear about the outlander that settled out in the Jundland Wastes?” the woman asked her friend as they examined what produce had made it to the small market.

Her friend gave her an exasperated look. “Why would I care about some outlander?”

The woman sniffed. “Rumor has it he saved old Thea from a bad-tempered Mercenary. And _then_ he walked her home, carried her bags and everything.” She sighed. “I do wish someone would carry _my_ bags home for me.”

Her friend rolled her eyes. “That’s because you’re an incurable romantic that even the suns couldn’t make see sense.”

—

The man helped his wife into his speeder, glancing at the man who’d just taken off in his old battered speeder. “Did you see that outlander? Ben, I think he said his name was.”

His wife craned her neck to follow the sight of the speeder. “The handsome one with the sad eyes?”

“You don’t have to describe him that way,” the man pointed out, only a little disgruntled. His wife was right after all, Ben _had_ been very handsome. “Yes, that’s the one. I heard he tricked Jabba into sparing one of his twi’lek slaves.”

His wife raised an eyebrow at that. “What was he doing around Jabba?”

“No one knows, he was just _there_ , right when he was needed.” That sounded appropriately mystical, he decided, since he had no idea what Ben had been doing there and it would be far less heroic a tale if he’d been in business with the local Hutt.

His wife seemed skeptical. “That’s ridiculous.”

“Ridiculous, but true. The twi’lek just got a position working at the tavern down the street, we can go ask her now!”

—

The moisture farmer heaved the container of water up onto his shoulder, making sure it was properly covered to avoid mass evaporation under the suns. “Did you hear about the fight out on the Darksun’s farm?”

His neighbor furrowed his brow, clearly concerned. “How many people were hurt?”

The moisture farmer smiled, it was rare to be the one who got to spread the good news, particularly when that news was as exciting as this. “That’s just it! None, that strange Ben fellow showed up and helped them protect the kids, and then once the kids were safe he somehow convinced the Tuskens and the Darksuns to stop fighting, negotiated some sort of peace between them.”

His neighbor gaped. “That’s not possible!”

The moisture farmer didn’t blame his neighbor for being surprised, with a history like theirs it _seemed_ impossible, which was what made it all the better a tale. “He did it, ask Lya Darksun yourself, she was there when it happened!”

—

“Did you hear about the Krayt sighting in Beggar’s Canyon?”

“There’s _always_ a Krayt sighting in Beggar’s Canyon. It’s not exactly something to be excited about.”

“Well _this_ time, the Sandwalker’s boys were there, stumbled right into a raging, hungry Krayt. Ran for their lives, but they were as good as gone.”

“I just saw the oldest Sandwalker boy just yesterday.”

“That’s because Ben showed up and somehow led the Krayt away. The Sandwalker’s boys ran straight home, sure he was a goner, but then he showed up at the market the next day with some of that bantha milk he collects from that herd he befriended.”

“He outran a Krayt?”

“You can’t just _outrun_ a Krayt.”

“Well, if he’s not dead he must have done something!”

—

Sometimes Obi-Wan thought he felt people’s eyes on him, thought he could sense whispers. But there was no malice, no suspicion, no warning of danger in the Force.

It was just people being people, and with the Force quiet and still, he didn’t let it worry him overmuch.

He was new, that was all, and new always brought whispers.

It would die down, he was sure of it.

—

“Did you hear….”

-_-

“Rumor has it that you know Ben Kenobi,” the words seemed innocent enough, but Beru couldn’t help the way her mind flashed immediately to the worst possible scenarios.

Ben Kenobi had never gone into much detail about his past, and news trickled to Tatooine slowly and often inaccurately. But she had put together enough to know that it would not be a good idea for her and Owen—for _Luke_ —to be too closely associated with the strange man.

And Eva Sunsfinder was the worst gossip Beru knew.

“We gave him directions once or twice,” she hedged. “He’s an outlander, you know how it is.”

For some reason, Eva brightened at that. “So you and Owen aren’t _close_ with him, then.”

“Oh no, most certainly not,” Beru said, hoping it didn’t come out _too_ emphatically. But Eva didn’t seem to be all that interested in the subtleties behind the answer, just the answer itself.

“But you know where he lives, yes? Out in the wastes?”

Beru considered lying about it, but it would be best to stay close to the truth, so she couldn’t get caught out on it later. “Yes, like I said, we’ve given him directions a few times.”

Eva hummed. “You wouldn’t mind giving me directions, would you?”

Beru’s mind screeched to a halt. “Pardon?”

Eva shrugged, though the smile on her face was far from innocent. “I was just hoping to drop by with Ranu, we’ve had some extra water gathered that we’d thought we’d share, Tatooine can be _quite_ the adjustment for someone unused to it, after all.”

“You want to… share water with him.” Beru couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow at that. There were different ways to share water with a person, some completely meaningless, but the way Eva had said it, combined with the look on her face, meant that Eva was fully intending on _sharing_ their water.

As far as courtship rituals went, it was a sign of fairly serious intent.

Eva straightened her shoulders, looking defensive. “He’s a good man, from what I’ve heard and what I’ve seen. Brave, capable, tender.” Her eyes went a little dreamy. “Have you _seen_ him with children?”

Beru blinked a few times, because she _had_ , and it had been an absolutely heart-warming and utterly attractive sight, even Owen, who strove not to be impressed with anything that Ben did, had agreed. It had been him, after all, that had finally extended the invitation for Ben to stop by more often, claiming any extra help around the farm was useful. “He’s helped out with Luke a few times.”

Eva gave her an unimpressed look. “And you and Owen didn’t consider trying to keep him around after that?” She shook her head.

Beru hesitated, not wanting to air Ben’s history, especially since she didn’t know all that much of it herself. “He’s had a difficult past.”

Eva didn’t seem surprised. “I had thought as much, you can see it in his eyes.” She smiled, and it was a little soft. “And yet he’s still good. There are too few good men out there who you can trust will stay good when the suns are high and the air itself is dry. You can’t blame me for wanting that for Ranu and me.”

“No, I suppose not.” She sighed. “You’ll have your work cut out for you, I don’t expect he’s used to Tatooine courtships.”

She wondered if she should send a message to Ben, just so he had a heads up. She suspected that two strangers showing up on his doorstep and initiating a courting would be quite the cause of concern for the man.

She’d have Owen send him a message, just so Ben didn’t spook. After all, Eva and Ranu Sunsfinder were a good couple, solid, secure. Ben Kenobi could certainly do worse than catch their attention.

-_-

Obi-Wan had always been good with animals. Well, almost always. Qui-Gon had had a tendency of picking up strays and then handing them off to Obi-Wan to care for, which meant he’d learned _very_ quickly how to deal with animals.

It was part of what made it so easy to befriend the bantha herd that lived near his small little home. Large and peaceful, Obi-Wan found them a source of peace that even meditation didn’t quite equal. He expected it was because they were _alive_ and stable.

He had not quite expected that general amicability with animals to cross over with the Krayt Dragons that roamed the desert sands.

Or rather, the one Greater Krayt that had apparently decided to adopt him and who was quite staunch about keeping other predators away.

The bantha herd was not fond of the regular visitor, but after a bit of time, Obi-Wan had managed to persuade them that the Greater Krayt—who refused to be named—wouldn’t hurt them.

Still, he hadn’t quite realized just how remarkable his Greater Krayt visitor was until Owen Lars stopped by, stew from Beru with him.

Obi-Wan wasn’t quite sure why, but for some reason Beru had decided that Ben Kenobi was in dire need of her help or he’d perish out here in the wastes.

While he didn’t think he was in danger of perishing—or at least not in _dire_ danger of perishing—the food she sent Owen with whenever she sent Owen out to check on him was delicious.

But more, the fact that there was _someone_ —even if only a distant neighbor who didn’t even know his real name, out there—who cared just the slightest about whether he was still alive helped to keep him moving.

The solemn, practical man stopped short outside Obi-Wan’s home, eyes on the Greater Krayt. “You realize those things eat _sarlaccs_?” Owen turned his head just a little to give him a narrowed eyed look that Obi-Wan recognized as someone concerned for his sanity or possible lack thereof.

His heart ached a little, because Mace had been the last one to look at him that way, and his friend was now dead.

“I don’t think there are any sarlacc pits around here.” Obi-Wan gave the Greater Krayt a concerned look, he certainly hoped his new friend wasn’t going hungry, lurking around here.

“No, there aren’t.” Owen had the sound of someone who was explaining something simple. “Which would make _you_ look like a tasty snack.”

Obi-Wan glanced back at the Greater Krayt who was curled up lazily in the sand behind his home, one eye opened in a slit as she watched them. “Well, it’d be a quick death, I suppose,” he mused to himself.

Owen let out a despairing sigh, holding out the small container of soup. “Beru sent food, and she told me to warn you that you should be aware that you’ve created quite the stir and that there are more than a few people who’ve found you to be _quite_ the romantic prospect.”

Obi-Wan blinked several times, trying to get the words to compute. “Pardon?”

Owen shrugged. “You’ve been gaining attention. Don’t know why, you’re not exactly a marvel with the vaporators, but apparently outlanders are in fashion these days.”

Obi-Wan frowned, he’d ventured out a few times, but he couldn’t think of anything he’d done that would have been reason to garner attention, particular the _romantic_ attention that Owen seemed to be implying he’d gathered.

“I see. Thank you for the warning.” Perhaps he would disappear into the nearby canyons for a few days, just to make sure he avoided any potential visitors.

Owen shrugged. “There are some good folk, from what Beru says, you could do to be a little less lonely out here.”

Obi-Wan pursed his lips. “Trust me, none of those good folks deserve to be saddled with the likes of me.”

Owen snorted. “If you say so, Kenobi. But a word of advice, if you’re trying to avoid catching attention, you might want to stop being quite so charming.”

Obi-Wan had no idea what Owen was talking about, he was quite sure he was never more than polite, but he’d take it into consideration just to be on the safe side.

-_-

“I was wondering if… there is anything you might suggest to, ah,” Ben hesitated as though looking for the right words. “Help me gently discourage prospective suitors.”

Beru gave the man in front of her a long, considering look. “That’s not likely to be easy. You’ve… built quite the reputation for yourself. What exactly is the problem?”

Ben looked a mix of exasperated and confused. “I’ve had four couples come visit my home in the past month, three single men, and four women. I’ve been offered more water in the past month than I’ve seen the whole time I’ve been on Tatooine.”

“Did you accept the water?” Beru asked, curious.

Ben shook his head, looking somewhat exasperated. “It was very clear an _offering_ of water, and not just an offer of water.” He sighed. “I might not know much about Tatooine customs, but Anakin—” He winced at the name. “—taught me enough to know what that means.”

Beru watched him for a long moment as he continued cutting the vegetables she’d gathered; he’d stopped by on his way home to see if they needed anything, and had accepted her suggestion that she help him make dinner while Luke was down for a nap.

“Loneliness can dry and crack a soul more quickly than the suns, Ben.” She turned back to the bantha meat Owen had brought for her. She didn’t know much about the Jedi, though Ben would never admit that was what he’d been, and what she did know she expected had been grossly misconstrued and inaccurate. “Tatooine doesn’t see relationships the same way much of the galaxy does. It doesn’t have to be overwhelming passion or the deepest, truest love. Sometimes it’s just companionship, understanding, acceptance.”

Ben smiled a little, though there was an ache in his eyes. “That’s not so different from where I come from. Love versus attachment. Anakin… he never seemed to understand that.”

Beru had only met Anakin the one time. He had left quite an impression on her, though not necessarily a good one. He’d fixed their radiator. He’d also done _something_ out there in the wastes that had led to relations between the Tuskens and moisture farmers nearly turning into outright war.

She wondered at the young woman that had been with him, with her beautiful clothes and kind eyes.

She thought, that if she was looking for it, she might see some of her in Luke’s eyes.

“The desert teaches you that nothing lasts, and life teaches us to enjoy it while we can.” She met Ben’s eyes. “I’m not saying you have to accept anyone’s water offerings, but perhaps you don’t have to flee from them quite so fast.”

Ben laughed. “I hear what you’re saying, Beru.” He shook his head. “But really, the constant suitors coming to my home has made it far easier to find, I’m not exactly looking to draw attention. One day danger will find me and I don’t want someone innocent getting caught in the middle of that.”

Beru decided not to mention that if Ben hadn’t wanted to draw attention then he shouldn’t have intervened in that bar fight, stopping the mercenary who had somehow never learned what ‘no’ meant, or any of the other things he’d done that had drawn the attention of every respectable person within rumor distance. “You don’t strike me as the type of person who’ll live their entire life in fear of what might be.” For some reason the words made Ben flinch as though struck, and Beru softened her tone. “Tatooine _is_ dangerous, Ben. We’ve all made our peace with that.”

Ben sighed. “Not danger like this.”

Beru didn’t argue it, she didn’t know enough to know. “There is one very easy way to get your potential suitors to stop coming by.”

Ben looked at her, eyes bright and hopeful. “What?”

Between his competence, his general charming behavior, and a smile that hit a person straight in the gut, it really was no surprise that everyone wanted him. Beru grinned at him, stealing his vegetables and dumping them in the broth. “Accept one. Then the rest will accept defeat.”

Ben sighed, shaking his head with a laugh. “You’re right, but that’s not at all helpful.”

Beru grinned, and wondered if maybe, perhaps, she should talk to Owen when he got in from the farm.

-_-

“You’re good with Luke.” Owen handed Ben the container of food Beru had prepared. “You’re handy on the farm. And you're a good man.”

Ben gave him a slightly confused look. “Thank you?”

“It’s not love, not yet, and maybe not ever. But Beru likes you, and I daresay I’m almost fond of you by now.”

Ben blinked, and Owen could see the slow dawn of comprehension on his face. Beru had said that Ben would catch on quickly. “Beru says you should come for dinner tomorrow, if you like, and we can talk about whether an offering of water is something we might like.” He gestured to the food. “If not, there are no hard feelings, and we can continue as we are. You can visit Luke when you like and I might still ask for your help on the farm.”

Ben was gaping, just a little. “I see. I will… consider that.”

Owen nodded. “You do that.” He turned away from Ben’s door, glancing at the Greater Krayt dragon curled at the back of Ben’s home. “We can even find a place for your Greater Krayt to rest that won’t get in the way.”

It would certainly make sure that even the most vicious of Jabba’s tax collectors kept clear of the farmstead.

“Thank you,” Ben sounded bemused, now. “Both she and I appreciate that.”

Owen headed home, Beru and Luke waiting for him when he entered the small homestead. “Do you think he’ll come?”

Owen considered the question. He hadn't known what to think, when Beru had suggested that perhaps it might be nice if Ben stayed. But the idea had grown on him. As he'd told Ben, it wasn't love, not yet. But it was respect, and it was concern, and it was something that had the potential to grow. “It’s hard to say. But I think we should set aside some of our purest water, just in case.”

-_-

Ben Lars stared at the two droids that Luke had purchased, memories of when he’d been Obi-Wan Kenobi rising to the surface in ways they hadn’t in years.

R2-D2 turned to him, almost immediately projecting the small holo of a young woman that he knew immediately, for all that he hadn’t seen her since he’d held her in his arms as a baby.

_Help me Obi-Wan Kenobi, you’re my only hope._

Beru and Owen were watching him, eyes concerned and lips pressed together as though they already knew what he was about to say. Luke was staring at the figure of his sister with wide eyes and rapt attention.

“I need to leave,” he told them. The next words came with startling ease, but nearly two decades at the side of his spouses. “And you need to leave the farm, we’re about to have the sort of visitors you don’t want to be around to meet.”

Owen frowned, but not in disagreement, just calculation. “I need a few hours to get things settled here. You and Beru can pack what we need. We’ll come with you.”

“We’re leaving?” Luke asked, startled at the suddenness of the decision.

Ben opened his mouth to protest Owen’s decision. He was headed straight into battle, straight into a war that had never really needed.

Beru was already moving. “Well, we’re not about to let your uncle Ben go without us. He’d run straight into trouble.”

“This will be dangerous,” Ben tried to warn them.

Beru and Owen gave him matching looks of exasperation. “We’re aware, Ben.” Beru’s eyes softened. “And that’s why we’re going together.” She moved close, giving him a soft kiss. “We’re in this together, Ben. We always will be.” She drew back. “But you’re the one who has to explain to the Greater Krayt why she’s not allowed to come with us.”

Owen was already leaving, on the comms with one of their neighbors offering to sell them part of the farm for some easy credits.

Beru was giving Luke orders to go grab everything he needed because the chances were high that they were never coming back.

For Ben, everything he needed was right here with him, and it was coming with him to meet the future.


End file.
